Showing posts with label relationships. Show all posts
Showing posts with label relationships. Show all posts

Thursday, March 11, 2010

Merging Roads and Alternate Routes


I am pleased to be hosting Fiction Friday today. If you write fiction and would like to share a short story or poem with other fiction writers, feel free to leave a link to your story and place the Fiction Friday button in your post.



The story I am sharing today is just for fun. It stems from a favorite activity of mine -people watching.



Merging Roads and Alternate Routes
by Sharlyn Guthrie


I plug in my laptop under the booth at Jimmy’s Café as I do every Wednesday, my Sunday column begging to be written. Jimmy’s morning business is light and predictable, an aid to the writing process.

The regulars have pulled two tables together near the kitchen. Nine men and Shirley sit at awkward angles, clutching newspapers and reaching in to set their coffee down. Their lively banter bounces from today’s headlines, to the price of gasoline, to Harold’s nephew, Scott, who is running for mayor.

Shirley, the saucy waitress, pauses in her ribbing and railing to deliver my customary cinnamon roll. I pay her, so as not to disturb her again. This is the finest part of her day, nine men vying shamelessly for her attention like a passel of schoolboys with one puppy.

Another patron, Earl, enters flipping his cell phone shut and slipping it into his knapsack. We exchange pleasantries at the coffee bar.

“Have you seen any wonderful plays lately?” It’s our singular topic of conversation.

“No. Have you?”

Earl elaborates on Wicked, which he saw last week, then slides into the booth directly across from mine. Up close his soft blue eyes were warm and engaging; now, from across the room, they seem to peer down a long and winding road. I cannot tell if the road leads to or away from the place occupying his thoughts. His unruly gray curls seem tamer today, and his sweater with the ragged elbows is missing. He fidgets with his collar and glances often toward the door.

As I rework my introductory paragraph for the third time, the door opens and Earl leaps to his feet. A tall, slender woman charges the stale air inside Jimmy’s as she and Earl embrace beneath the ceiling fan. “You’re gorgeous,” he declares, and she is. Suddenly conscious of my own appearance, I finger my bangs and tuck straying strands into my pony tail.

Perfectly matched in height, the pair regards each other for several moments. Blonde hair brushes the shoulders of her crisp white blouse. Her dark floral skirt flares, ending at the knee. Slender tanned legs stretch elegantly into leather sandals. She flicks a corkscrew curl on Earl’s forehead and they laugh like old friends. “You didn’t tell me about these,” she coos, and continues springing his buoyant curls on all sides.

Try as I might to get back to work, I am too preoccupied with Earl and his lovely companion. Even the regulars have quieted themselves, glancing curiously in Earl’s direction now and then. The couple leans forward across the table chatting, ignoring their cooling coffee cups. Earl has temporarily forgotten that other place and the long road. The two are present here, perhaps seeking a path they might take together. Now I abandon my column altogether, choosing instead to document a romance.

An hour and a half later, Earl draws a small black book -a Bible, from his knapsack. Turning it sideways, he points as he reads. She smiles and nods and they bow their heads, holding hands across the table. The walls of Jimmy’s Café have never been so hallowed. I strain to make out the words Jimmy prays, but even if I could I would not repeat them. They flutter upwards like butterfly wings too delicate to grasp. Finally, they rise and he walks her to the door, releasing her hand only when she is at arm’s length.

Unable to help myself, I promptly join Earl at the coffee bar. “Did you meet your friend at a play?” I ask.

“Sophia? No. Today was our first meeting.” Earl chuckles as I attempt to conceal my surprise and confusion. “My sister gave me Sophia’s phone number. It took me a month to drum up the courage to call her.”

“So that’s it? You called her up and asked her to meet you here?”

“Not exactly. We’ve spent another month getting acquainted over the phone. We talk nearly every day, sometimes for hours. I think I can truly say we’ve grown to love each other, but I never knew until today that she’s so beautiful.”

“Will you marry her?” I chide myself even as I blurt the invasive question.

“No, but I do hope to accompany her down the aisle someday.” Earl grins at my stunned expression. “You see, Sophia’s my daughter.”

My curiosity is satisfied, but I am still blushing. Reigning in my imagination, I return to my booth, determined to get back on track with Sunday's column.

Across the room Earl sips his coffee, peering with pleasure down a much shorter road.





Thursday, October 22, 2009

Time For a Little Romance





























Thirty-five years ago this week, on October 19, 1974, John and I were married. It is one of the finest choices I have ever made. Our marriage has always been something we both nurture and treasure. John has a great sense of humor, and he is an excellent husband. He is also a great father to our three sons, and now revels in the title "Papa," which his grandchildren adoringly call him.

With thoughts focused on our marriage this week, I thought I would share a couple of poems. The first poem is "Forever Fall," which I wrote for John for this anniversary. If it's a little too mushy for you, then you might enjoy the second one, "All Shook Up At The Hop," which received an Editor's Choice award for the topic "embarrassed" on Faithwriters. It was written in John's "voice" (with his full approval), and it's basically the true story of one of our early dates.

Ah.....memories!



Forever Fall

When scarlet sumac fires raged,
fine feathery fronds of pampas waved.
Midst pumpkins, squash and bittersweet,
you held my hands and vowed to be
my life’s companion, ally, love;
the prince that I’d been dreaming of.
Cloudless evening’s crimson warning
beckoned glistening frost by morning.

Three decades and a half have flown.
Love, through each season past, has grown.
Now fall’s vibrant, leafy showers
blanket summer’s fading flowers.
Fair autumn scenes our senses fill.
Her breezes make us quiver still;
lift rapturous hearts in whirling dance;
stir memories and ignite romance.

~Sharlyn Guthrie





All Shook Up at the Hop

I’d spoken to her many times.
We’d had a casual date.
Every time I saw that girl
my heart would palpitate.

She was a gorgeous cheerleader
and I was just Joe Schmuck.
I feared approaching her again
would really push my luck.

And yet here was my opening;
it seemed the perfect chance.
I offered to escort her to
our college “Fifties Dance.”

Great beads of perspiration
upon my brow arose.
Shrugging, she replied with
a resounding, “I suppose.”

My heart did several flip-flops.
I was thrilled beyond belief.
“Stay cool,” my ego whispered
as I trembled with relief.

A prize was being offered
for the couple dressed the best.
I found the perfect get-up.
I knew she’d be impressed.

Saddle shoes and poodle skirt
bedecked my Sally Jean,
plus a curve-enhancing sweater
and a scarf in kelly green.

She called my broken glasses
taped together with a wad
a crazy stroke of genius.
Whew! What an act of God!

With confidence and valor
I took her by the hand,
then turned and twirled and spun her
to the be-bop of the band.

My rhythm was atrocious.
I could not keep the beat;
so I tried to keep her moving
without stepping on her feet.”

We twisted, shook and shimmied
‘til the final song was played;
then caught our breath and waited
as the costumes were assayed.

“Eight finalists were chosen,”
said the judge who held the page.
I beamed at Sally Jean as
we were called up to the stage.

“The winner,” he continued,
is really quite a clown.
While he has been up dancing,
his zipper has been down.”

In haste my eyes averted.
How I prayed it wasn’t me!
Then I glimpsed my whitey-titeys.
What a grim catastrophe!

My trembling fingers fumbled.
The crowd –how it did roar!
I wished that I could disappear
or melt into the floor.

My blood was surging upward
in a retroactive rush.
It set my heart to pounding,
made my whole complexion flush.

At last my pants were fastened,
and I peered at Sally Jean.
She grabbed my hand and flashed the
biggest smile I’d ever seen.

“We won! We get two tickets
to the big concert next week!”
she squealed, and then she planted
a wet kiss upon my cheek.

Another date with Sally?
My head began to whirl.
I’d take being embarrassed
if it meant I got the girl.




Joe and Sally Jean (Johnson) Schmuck are celebrating thirty-five years of marriage this year. Although Joe’s sense of rhythm has not improved, his philosophy, “Keep her dancing, without stepping on her toes,” suits Sally just fine.



For more great fiction, please visit Lynn Squire's blog, FAITH, FICTION, FUN, AND FANCIFUL

Tuesday, March 31, 2009

Sweet, Like Perfume


“For most of this century we have wrongly defined soul wounds as psychological disorders and delegated their treatment to trained specialists. Damaged psyches aren’t the problem. The problem is disconnected souls."

~Larry Crabb
Connecting: Healing Ourselves and Our Relationships


This is the quote we are examining for “In Other Words” today, which is hosted by Esthermay at The Heart of a Pastor’s Wife.


Two years ago my husband, John, and I were invited by our pastor to attend some training sessions on becoming marriage mentors through a state-funded program called “Marriage Matters.” Since our marriage has always been very precious to us, we decided it would be a privilege to encourage other couples in their marriages.

We were surprised at how little actual training was offered. “The best thing you can offer is yourselves,” the organizer told us. “You have experienced life and worked through things in your marriage. Just share with your couples how you went about that...what worked, and what didn’t work.”

To say that we felt inadequate is an understatement.

In our two years of working with couples experiencing marriage difficulties we have discovered some common threads.

    *Communication between these spouses is very difficult or non-existent.

    *None of the couples we have mentored have friends in common. Either they each have their own friends, or one has friends and the other does not. They do not hang out with other married couples.

    *Most of the couples have already tried counseling, have found it lacking, and are now ready to try mentoring as a “last resort.”


The last point came as such a surprise to us. John and I are totally inexperienced and lacking in professional knowledge and skills, and yet these couples are coming to us? It makes no sense. Or does it?

Perhaps an ordinary couple willing to share real struggles and successes is more beneficial to some couples than a professional offering book knowledge at a set cost per hour.

Perhaps it’s our availability. Sure, we have to set some limits to guard our own lives and marriage, but we are willing to take phone calls and answer e-mails from our couples or even schedule special meetings as needed (all at no cost to the couple).

Perhaps it’s the fact that we pray with the couple before and after each session, asking the Lord to work in our hearts as well as theirs, making each of us tender and receptive. This has often been an emotional experience for the couple and for us as well. We then assure them that we are praying for them regularly between sessions.

One of the couples we mentored is a couple we have known for many years, or at least we thought we knew them. It turns out that many of our assumptions, based on outward appearances, were false. They were on the verge of divorce, and dealing with some serious injuries and issues of distrust. We had some very direct and difficult conversations with them that I would have never imagined taking place. Although we would have considered this couple “friends” before we mentored them, we grew to love them through the time we spent together. Although the mentoring ended several months ago, we touch base with them often. We were recently invited to their home, which was a big step for them as a couple, and one of the issues we had addressed. What a blessing!
I truly believe we had a greater influence on this couple because we approached them as friends, which underscores this verse of Scripture:

“Oil and perfume make the heart glad, So a man’s counsel is sweet to his firend.” Proverbs 27:9 (NAS)


I could say so much more about marriage mentoring. It has even strengthened our marriage as we pray together for our couples, decide which issues to address, and plan our approach. In the context of Larry Crabb’s quote, however, I would say that marriage mentoring has demonstrated to us the importance of connecting. Married couples need to connect with each other through good communication. They need to connect with other married couples to learn from them, gain support and accountability, and share common experiences. And in the midst of marriage difficulties, it seems that connecting with a mentor couple who is simply willing to share themselves is very beneficial, too.

I wouldn’t go so far as to say that professional counselors aren’t necessary, and I don’t believe that is what Larry Crabb has in mind, either. I am convinced that in his years of professional counseling he has learned many of the same things we are learning through mentoring –that God has created within each of us a critical need for connection. Of course our primary need is for connection with God, Himself. From there our need extends outward to others, and it is truly sweet when that connection meets their needs as well as our own.