Every Good Gift

I told my Pre-kindergarteners about Uganda yesterday. I watched their eyes widen as I told of hundreds of children without parents. I witnessed their disbelief as I added that most don’t have homes. They made anguished faces when I described the only food the children at Smile Africa get to eat each day –a cup of porridge and a bowl of rice- and how the children at King’s Primary spend 9-10 hours a day at school without lunch or even a snack. They tried hard to imagine children like themselves so hungry they have difficulty thinking and learning.

 I showed them a five minute video from last summer’s trip and they couldn’t get enough…”Again, again!” they shouted, and we played it again.

 What happened next shouldn’t have surprised me, but it did. A spontaneous session of thanksgiving erupted among my little troop of four and five year olds. They thanked God for their mommies and daddies, for their sisters and brothers, for the yummy breakfasts they had and the dinner they knew they would enjoy later, for warm houses, for bedrooms and snuggly covers on their beds, and of course for toy dinosaurs, puppies, paint sets, and Barbie dolls.

 Even before walking into my classroom yesterday morning a verse was playing in my mind. I shared that verse with my students, urging them not to forget that God is the giver of all things good, that even the good things we do are God’s gifts to others through us. The next several minutes were spent brainstorming what they could do for the hungry children across the sea. “Do they have milk?” one bright student asked, “because we could get them two cows -a girl cow for milk and and a boy one to eat.”

 Just as my day was ending I received an email from a friend that included the above photo. For the past two years my friend’s nine year old daughter, aptly named Grace, has requested pillowcases for her birthday. Then she and her mom make them into dresses to clothe orphan girls in Africa. She and her mom pray as they sew, for each future recipient of a dress –the dresses in the photo are the ones Grace made this year. I have the privilege of delivering those dresses into the hands of beaming, grateful girls –a very good gift from the only Father they have, and proof that He has not forgotten them.

 The photo itself was a precious gift to me, but I was astounded to see printed on it the same verse that had been running through my head all day –the one I had shared with my students:

“Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the father of heavenly lights who does not change like shifting shadows.” James 1:17

Travel Preparation Mercies

I am participating today in “Thankful Thursday,” hosted by Sonya at Truth for the Journey.

Recently, I have begun collecting what I need for my trip to Uganda in June, and planning how I will pack it all. I won’t need so much in the way of clothing, but we will have a lot of exposure to the elements, so I need to take things like hat, sunscreen, insect repellent, and plastic bags. We also have to take a lot of our food. In many ways it is like packing for the trips we often make to the Boundary Waters Canoe Area in Minnesota/Canada.

Most of my cargo, however, will be things for the Ugandans we will be ministering to. Many wonderful friends have helped me collect toothpaste, toothbrushes, dental floss, and eye glasses. I am also taking some teaching tools...a puppet, and some Bible story big books from a Sunday school curriculum, as well as a large bag of candy. As I prepare for this trip I am filled with gratefulness. Here are some things that come to my mind in the way of praise today:

• I am thankful for the generosity so many have shown in helping me fund my trip. In the beginning I was a bit uncomfortable asking for help, but God has provided so amazingly through the generosity of some great friends and family members. He also provided us with a surprise tax refund this year. What a blessing!

• I am thankful for a few ladies who took it upon themselves to ask dentists and eye clinics for donations. I am amazed and overwhelmed by the result! Of course I’m also thankful for the dentists and doctors that donated.

• I am thankful for all of those who have promised to pray for me and the rest of the team. I am specifically thankful for a couple of friends who are my designated prayer partners.

• I am thankful that I live in a country with a stable and relatively honest government. It is so easy to complain about how things are going here, but we have it good! I am reading a book about Idi Amin and the severe injustices that occurred under his reign in Uganda. Many of today’s problems in Uganda resulted from his abuse of power.

• I am thankful that I always have plenty of good food and fresh water, and that I don’t normally have to worry about contracting diseases through what I ingest.

• I am extremely thankful for this opportunity I have to minister to and encourage the people I meet in Uganda –to share God’s love and message of hope and salvation with them. Even though my suitcases will be overflowing with items to give them, I am pretty sure I will receive much more than I give. My life will be changed forever.

• I am thankful that God is stretching me, but also allowing me to use the specific gifts and abilities He has given me. He is so good! His faithfulness and grace are evident in both big ways and small.

Thanksgiving For Dreadful Deeds

Internet Cafe Chat
by Sharlyn Guthrie
My father was an elementary principal. He faithfully attended church, taught Sunday school, and even preached on occasion. He provided well for our family. I always had adequate shelter, good food, and comfortable clothing. My parents paid for music lessons, allowed me to go to church camp, and at times sent me to private school.

My father molested me…not once, but continually. As I grew older I resisted and pushed him away; I was disgusted, but quite honestly it was just the way life was, so I guess I thought of it as normal. He didn’t stop trying to molest me until after I left home.

I began to see my family life as less than ideal, so as an adolescent I began to make a mental list of things I didn’t want to repeat in my own life. In some ways I was mature beyond my years. I grew into a close dependence on my Heavenly Father. In other ways I was lacking, particularly when it came to setting personal boundaries. I was also a people pleaser and a terrible communicator. Oh, I liked to talk! But I buried my feelings and hid behind my Christianity, just like my parents did.

As you might guess, I was quite vulnerable as a teenager. Discussing sex at home was taboo. My parents had rules, but the rules seemed more effective in protecting their image than protecting me. Besides, I was already ruined, and I was pretty sure it had to be my fault. Somehow, by God’s grace –and I REALLY mean that— I got through my teen years without being raped or worse, although I was victimized by other family and non-family members.

My story has had many twists and turns, but I’ll suffice it here to say that I married a “prince” of a man and I’m living happily ever after. God is so good!

Just a few of the things that have been a struggle in my life are these: feeling worthy, feeling forgiven, feeling nothing, enjoying sex with my husband (initially), facing the reality of my father’s incestuous advances, confronting my father, exposing a family legacy of lies, forgiving my father, losing my relationship with a sister, honoring a father who was less than honorable…the list goes on.

Can you thank me for trusting you with this experience even if I never tell you why? ~God

This was the question I struggled with most. One by one I worked through the other issues over months and years. Just when I would think an issue was solved, it would bare its fangs, mocking me. None of it happens over night, even with Jesus. I wouldn’t want to go through it without Him, it’s true. But healing takes time, and it’s hard!

When my father passed away seven years ago I finally felt the freedom to begin talking about this aspect of my life, partly to aid in my own healing, and partly to reach out to others dealing with similar experiences. It has helped to answer the question.

I will always wonder why I wound up with an earthly father who didn’t know how to love. But I have never once doubted the love of my Heavenly Father. Still, am I thankful?

I was fifty years old and had experienced yet another excruciatingly painful event before I was able to say, “Thank you, God, for giving me the father you did. Thank you for allowing me to feel the pain his unwanted advances inflicted. It drew me to You in ways nothing else could. It gave me empathy for the pain of others. It made me a better parent. It made me see the reality of my own sinfulness and my need for Your forgiveness. It taught me to be loving and forgiving. From dreadful deeds, you have produced beautiful fruit. You are a God to be praised!”

"I waited patiently for the Lord, he turned to me and heard my cry. He lifted me out of the slimy pit, out of the mud and mire; he set my feet on a rock, and gave me a firm place to stand. He put a new song in my mouth, a hymn of praise to our God. Many will see and fear and put their trust in the Lord." Psalm 40:1-3